Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Being a wife and mother while not feeling good

  I have read several blogs and articles of mothers who live and deal with chronic issues.  And I applaud their parenting skills!  God definitely doesn't give us more than we can handle, and he knows that they are stronger than I am! 

  However, I do live with severe indoor/outdoor allergies.  I normally only have an attack about once a month, worst case scenerio once every two weeks.  And I normally can feel it coming on and can do certain things to prevent them.  Out of 120 things tested, I was highly allergic to everything but 3.  However, I'm not allergic to any foods (thank goodness, because I LOVE to eat!!!)  But if it's a mold, dust mite, tree, pollen, weed, cockroach residue (my Dad and I used to joke about this all the time, then I married Ronnie and now my last name is Roach.... not so funny anymore ;), hay, sawdust, ect, I'm sure to have a reaction.  I tried shots for a few years, and it did help some, but still had pretty bad attacks.  And I could not do shots will pregnant, so I gave those up.  I've tried pretty much every medicine and I mostly have to go back and forth between medicinces because my body becomes immune to a certain one after awhile.  I've been looking into more herbal treatments for about a year now, but have not found anything that even touches me. 
  When I have an attack, I try to immediately go and sleep it off, if I can get to sleep early on my sinuses will dry it up and I can move on with life.  If I wait too long and try to blow my nose or just breath through it, it worsens very quickly.  I can't breathe, I can't see very well because of blurry vision and itchy eyes.  My head feels like it will explode at any moment.  I can barely walk from one room to another without having to sit down and catch my breath.  I can go through a box of tissues in about 10 minutes.  Once I'm in a full blown attack, it takes me about a day and a half to get over it completely and then my body is just weak and tired.

  With all that being said, I'm not looking for sympathy.  I want to give a word of encouragement in two different levels.  The first one, in my marriage.....

  When Ronnie and I first met, it wasn't long before he realized how sickly I was.  I remember throwing up in front of him on Christmas Day and being so embarrassed and him just standing there holding my hair, telling me it was going to be alright.  I remember thinking, this is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with!!!  However, after the honeymoon is over......I'm not sure what happened exactly, if I came to expect him to come at my every beckon call or if he started to think I whined over every little thing.  But very soon, I was holding my own hair again and really feeling sorry for myself.  
  I remember a few years ago when he was really sick and he complained how I never really took care of him when he was sick and I got to thinking.  If he really thinks that, then no wonder he doesn't nurse me anymore.  So I tried really hard to tend to his needs when he had a cold or the flu (which doesn't happen very often, the man is made of steel!!!)  And something happened!!!  I started noticing how he was more aware of my needs when I was sick.  It's amazing how selfish we become when we have something wrong, and how blind we can be of the needs around us.  Even in our own house.  It's taken us several years to figure out how to care for one another, but we are getting much better ;)

Now, as for the children.....I heard a sermon one time on Daniel when he saw one of his visions.

Daniel 8:27 And I, Daniel, fainted and was sick for days; afterward I arose and went about the king’s business. I was astonished by the vision, but no one understood it.
  He said even after all that he had saw, he still got up after been sick for days and went about the king's business.  He didn't continue to lay in bed and moan and whine about what was going to happen.  There was work to be done!  This has always stuck with me.  It is very important to rest and to get better.  But not to lay in bed for days and be depressed about my situation and worry myself to death about when the next attack will hit and what I will miss when it does.  There's work to be done.  I have children to raise! 
  When I watched the Homemaking 101 Video about a year ago, there was a lady on there that was an older Titus 2 woman who talked about being sick and having to still take care of her young children. 
Honestly, I don't remember what I did when Derek and Lindsay were babies.  I'm sure I called my mother-in-law and she gladly watched them for me.  I'm sure that I had someone to come help me.  So I'm sorry, if you have littles and are sick, I'm not sure what the answer is if you don't have help :(  I pray that you find a close friend. 
  However, there is hope for the future!   My oldest and my youngest of inherited my allergies :(  So they know first hand how awful it can be to have an attack.  I have diligently trained my children to "take care of themselves" when Mommy is not well.  Derek and Lindsay both know how to make simple meals for themselves and Leah.  I have also taught Derek how to measure medicine, so this past attack that I had that was so bad, Derek brought my medicine to me with something to drink.  Even though the house is usually pretty messed up when I finally "wake up", the kids do know how to go on while Mommy is down. 
  I know I "preach" chores, orderliness of the house, and training of the children alot, but there is reason and blessing that comes from all the hard work!   
 Proverbs 10:1  A wise son makes a glad father,
But a foolish son is the grief of his mother.

How do you deal with sickness in your house?  Are your children aware of the needs around them?  Are you tending to your husband's needs? 
Have a Blessed Day!
Amanda :)

1 comment:

  1. Great article and great job you are doing!!