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Friday, April 27, 2012

Have I grown?

  I had to chuckle as I typed this title, because if you know me personally, you're thinking, well no!!!  Where is she going with this one?  Because, you see I'm 4'11 and I've not grown since the 4th grade (or at least that's the last time anyone noticed!)  I remember coming back from summer break and walking into my classroom the first day of 4th grade.  I was very excited because several of my friends were in my class this year, including, my all time (and every other girl in the 4th grade) crush, Richie.  Sometime around lunch time we would line up to get our lunch boxes and Richie came over by me and said, "Wow, Amanda, I think you actually grew!"  And he was serious!!!  I couldn't believe it!!!  One that he had talked to me and two that I had grown!!!  I was on cloud nine!!!
  Anyway, that really had nothing to do with my post, just made me think of it when I titled it ;)

  So I've been thinking about my New Year's Resolutions and thinking that I've been failing miserably!  Not to mention someone (out of the kindness of their heart) posted some really "nice" things after I posted them.  Which it's ok, I've been learning to tell the difference between signs of God and Satan trying to tear me down.  Anyhow, in all reality, they are truly just goals, something I want to strive toward, not something I must achieve each and every day!  It really got me to thinking, am I really failing or is that Satan also?  As I sit and look around my house, I realize, I truly have grown alot, especially in the past year.  If you had come over to our house(our trailer) a couple of years ago and given me a week's notice, this is what you would have found....

Everything in order......


Everything in it's place.....


Including the perfect picture.....cat in the window...


  But if you had come without notice........



  Well there are no picture of that!!!  For a reason!!!  I was terrible and it didn't bother me in the least!  I told myself all the time, other people's houses looked just like this, and if someone else wanted it clean, they could come do it themselves.....ahem.....  I know, not a good attitude, right?  The house was the one thing Ronnie and I ever fought about.  Coming from the military, he likes everything in a nice neat order.  I do too, to a certain affect.  As long as it has a place, I'm ok.  I don't like clutter, but if it has a home, and it's just out, well that's understood, at least I know it can eventually go back there. 

  For Ronnie's sake (and probably my mother and grandmother) God started working in my heart.  And I realized, I did have the wrong attitude all together.  Now, I'm not saying by any means that my house is in perfect order, especially on Monday mornings (you don't want to come over then!)  But at least now, I can feel a twinge of guilt when Ronnie pulls in the drive and the kids and I have forgotten or been to busy to pick up around the house.  And I clean now because I want to, not because I know someone is coming and I want to make a good impression. 

  So yes, I feel like I have grown alot.  I've not reached my goals, but I need to always be setting new ones.  And I know I will never have it all together, that's what heaven's for!  As long as I put on Christ everyday and have a little tune in my soul (which by the way, there are definately days, I fail!!!!), I feel like I've grown about 3 feet since 4th grade!!! 

  Remember we CAN do all things through Christ who gives us strength!!!!  Have a Blessed Day!!!